


Not My Future (Part 1)

by QuietDarkness



Series: Simplicity and Complexity (Harrisco) [41]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-03-03
Packaged: 2019-03-26 13:51:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13859073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuietDarkness/pseuds/QuietDarkness
Summary: Four years after the attempt on Harry's life at Christmas, nothing is the same. Life is chaos for Metas, and Cisco is barely the man he used to be, all thanks to the Stalker. Some things just don't get better with time...'Opposites don't just attract. They catch fire and burn the entire city down.'(Part 41)





	Not My Future (Part 1)

It wasn't the first time he'd sat there, staring at the painting on the wall. It was, however, the first time in a long time he'd dusted the edges of it, ran his fingers over the structure of the frame, cleaned the glass of anything that may have smudged it. Nothing ever did. No one ever could.

It was just him, after all.

Cisco stepped back slowly, till his calves hit the coffee table, stopping him. His hands hung loosely at his sides, the dust rag dropped haplessly behind him onto the pile of papers, magazines and fast food boxes. He let his eyes roam over the painted constellations over the visage of S.T.A.R. Labs, just as Maggie had painted for him and Harry that Christmas... what felt like forever ago. 

Sometimes, it felt like yesterday.

Thunder rumbled outside, making him blink and reach up to run his hand through his messy hair. He hadn't brushed it today. Hadn't done much of anything, really. He looked toward the large windows, the sky outside as gray as the dark interior of the apartment. The rain drops moved down the panes in a race to a finish without rewards. It tore a sigh from his lungs that didn't do much more than make him feel tired, which was pretty sad considering he'd spent half the day lazing around doing next to nothing. 

Most of his days were like that.

He tinkered. Helped when Barry really needed it. Hung out with Caitlin when he eventually couldn't stave off her kindness. Sold his gadgets. But alone was good, alone was best. Alone was... awful.

“You should really clean this place up, don't you think?” Maggie asked, the door closing shortly after and the lights switching on. He turned, blinking, slightly startled. He hadn't even heard her come in. He instantly smoothed out the front of his t-shirt, straightened his sweatpants, though it probably didn't matter. He knew he looked like crap. Maggie, on the other hand, looked gorgeous as usual. Twenty years old and practically a model at this point. She was out of college and working full time at S.T.A.R. Labs with the team as Electra, as well as writing mathematical proofs that had her on the map, universities everywhere begging her to come lecture and teach. At her age, it was unheard of. But dammit... Cisco couldn't be prouder. And sadder. Because he didn't have a hand in any of it. Not since... he took a step forward and cleared his throat a little. 

“Hey Mags.” He smiled softly, his voice a little dry. Probably because he hadn't spoken to anyone in a few days. She shed her trench coat, hanging it up, her long naturally brown hair in rivulets around her shoulders. Her bright green eyes looking at him kindly. Always kindly. He wished he could hate that. But it was one of the only good things in his life. “What brings you round?” She crossed the kitchen to the living room and hugged him, no pretense, no hesitation. 

“Missed you, Dad.” She said, sighing as she rested her head easily on his shoulder. He hugged her back, unable to stop himself. 

“I missed you, too.” He murmured, damn near willing his voice not to crack. She pulled away, kissing his cheek lightly as she went. 

“I have the rest of the day off, and I wanted to spend it with you.” She said, finally answering his question as she bent over and went about cleaning up the trash on the coffee table. He raised a brow, then moved toward her. 

“Hey, that's my mess! And... don't you have better things to do than hang out with your hermit pops?” He asked, attempting to snag the trash from her hands, but she hip checked him and carried it toward the kitchen. He blinked, straightening and frowned slightly. She was always doing this when she came by, which both warmed him and infuriated him. He could take care of himself... obviously... eh.

“Not today, I don't.” Maggie stepped on the foot pedal of the trash can, and paused when the lid opened to a full bag. Then she frowned a little and set her armful onto the already clustered counter before moving to open the cabinet beneath the sink. “I'm so hiring you a maid.” She said, pulling out a new bag and unfolding it. He moved up to her then.

“I don't need,” He took the bag right out of her hand, “A maid.” He said flatly, then grabbed the trash can and tugged it toward him. “I was going to get to all this. Eventually.” He pulled the full bag out while she crossed her arms and watched him with a 'yeah right' look as he switched the bags out. He tied up the full one and leaned it against the counter. Then crossed his arms, too. “What?” For a long moment, she just narrowed her gaze on him. Then she uncrossed her arms and grabbed his hand, tugging him along with her. “What, wait! What're you doin?”

“We're going out, you need fresh air.” Maggie replied, dragging him into the bedroom and only letting his hand go to pull clothes out of the dresser. 

“Uh, fresh air? In case you hadn't noticed, it's raining out. And, ya know...” he motioned with a round movement above his head, “Thunder and lightning? Not exactly fresh.” She smiled, turning to look at him with jeans and a fresh t-shirt in hand. 

“Last time I checked, you loved thunderstorms.” She held out the clean clothes toward him. “Go get dressed, Dad. I'm not taking no for an answer.” He sighed, grabbing the clothes. 

“Anyone ever tell you that you're aggressively adorable?” Cisco turned and headed for the bathroom before she could reply, but heard her soft chuckle behind him.

Truth was, he still loved thunderstorms. So much so that it hurt. Because they reminded him of...

Once the door was closed and it was just him in the dimly lit bathroom, thanks to only one working lightbulb, Cisco found himself staring at the oddness of his reflection. There were soft circles beneath his eyes. If someone didn't know him, he'd look almost homeless. Truth was, he was just hopeless. There was no sparkle in his gaze. The shadows that cascaded in a damp, sickly yellow around him didn't help. Even brushing his hair, his teeth, washing his face, changing his clothes, only did so much. When all was said and done, there was still a heaviness around him. A terrible cloud that surrounded him, nearly engulfing him. It was so much a part of him now that if he saw himself without it, he probably wouldn't recognize himself. Or at least, the self he was now. 

The Cisco he used to be was long gone. There was no getting him back.

“Why are you doing this?” _Harry's voice was so soft, softer than he'd ever heard. He was holding the papers in his hands, not able to look at Cisco. For two months, Harry had tried. Endlessly, day after day, night after night. He'd tried everything he could, and Cisco loved him for it. But Cisco couldn't tell him the truth. Couldn't..._

_Cisco'd figured out how the Stalker knew everything. One of the metas that went missing had the ability to super-eavesdrop, which was putting it mildly. Focus on any one person or thing or place, and they could see and hear everything in that moment. If the Stalker stole that meta's abilities... then yes, they'd know. They'd know if Cisco was doing what they wanted him to do. And if he wasn't? Then they'd kill people. Lots of people. They'd kill Harry. He couldn't let that happen._

“Please... just sign them.” _Cisco said, surprised at how empty his own tone felt. He watched how rigid Harry's shoulders became. He knew what that meant. The pain was clear as day. But Harry turned away, slapped the papers down on the counter... and signed..._

“Dad?” Maggie's voice came through the door, startling Cisco just enough that he knocked his toothbrush off the sink with a small clatter. He let out a deep breath. 

“Yeah, I'm... I'm coming.” He managed, reaching over and picking it up, setting it back in its place, right next to where Harry's should have been. He stole one last glance of himself in the mirror, noticing the trimming of wetness in his eyes and he scrubbed at them. He didn't deserve to cry. Not after all this time. He tore away from the mirror, heaved a breath and opened the door. “Okay, punk.” He said, Maggie smiling at seeing his much fresher and cleaner image. “Where are you dragging my hermit self?” She smiled wider. 

“It's a surprise.”

* * *

“I think I hate surprises.” Cisco deadpanned, hands shoved as deep into his pockets as he could manage, shoulders hunched slightly inside his jacket. Maggie had her hand curled around his arm and she giggled lightly.

“Liar.” She leaned more into him as she watched the scene around them.

And a scene was exactly what it was.

Okay, maybe not a scene. But it was still a crowd. And then some. 

“How did you manage to get badges for this?” He asked, having to raise his voice slightly as he glanced once more at the lanyard hanging from his neck. Comic-Con in Central City was always a big deal. For obvious reasons. Trying to get tickets, let alone an all access badge, was like trying to pull teeth.

“Rob hooked me up.” She said, pulling on his arm and motioning to a less crowded area, rounding past a group of people dressed up as different variations of Deadpool.

“Rob, huh?” Cisco replied once they were up against a wall, giving her a wry smile. “You two've been dating for awhile.” He stated the obvious, but it made her blush, her hand coming up to curl some hair behind her ear. 

“Yeah, he's...” she shrugged and smiled, “Well, he's amazing.”

“But?” Cisco could read her like a book. He could see the hesitation in her eyes. She let out a small sigh as her hand dropped.

“I still haven't told him about the whole meta thing. I'm not sure I want to, now.” Maggie pulled her jacket off, handing him her purse just before she did. 

“Why not? Don't think he can handle it?” Cisco asked, glancing over her head to be sure there were no prying eyes or curious ears. 

“He's been reading about the Anti-Meta movement.” She replied, hanging her jacket over her arm with a deep frown, and Cisco found himself freezing.

“He doesn't believe all that bullshit, does he?” Cisco crossed his arms after handing her purse back. She rubbed her forehead momentarily.

“We've talked about it. And I've made my case. But it seems like he's against metas... the more he reads, the more he believes that Senator Pinsela is right. Makes me think our relationship is kind of doomed, ya know?” She moved a little closer to him as a Big Daddy cosplayer heaved his way by. 

The Anti-Meta Movement had started about two years ago, after Senator Ricardo Pinsela found out his daughter was a meta with the ability to control biotechnology with her mind. Instead of doing what a good father would do, he shunned her and she went on a rampage. The team stopped her, but innocent people died because of her. After that, the Senator made it his life's mission to track down and capture or terminate every meta there was. Of course, human rights were brought in to play. And he turned instead to putting them all on an index a lot like Cisco's. Except his was supposed to be public, putting all metas in the light along with their abilities and how powerful they were. Add to that his ideas of Metas being put on a watch list, as well as under new laws about how they could live their lives, and it caused a sort of 'war' between metas and anyone who sided with the Anti-Meta Movement. 

Trying to convince people like the Senator that not all Metas were evil was like trying to convince Flat-Earthers that the planet is, in fact, round. So these Metas came to the Flash in droves, looking for help, looking for save harbor. And with the team's help, they did everything they could to help keep these people under the radar. Of course there were still others who they didn't know about. And their lives were in danger every day. Hell, all of theirs were. But it was only going to get worse if legislation dropped and the laws were put in place.

“What are you going to do?” Cisco asked her. Maggie shook her head.

“Honestly, I don't know. I care about him, I really do. I just...” she sighed, “What do you think I should do?” Cisco raised both his brows.

“I think I'm the last person you should be asking for relationship advice for obvious reasons.” He replied quickly, arms dropping. Then he swallowed, watching her brows furrow. “But... you've got a good head on your shoulders, Mags. You have to do what's best for you. Don't let anyone else tell you otherwise.” It took her a moment, but she nodded. Though he had a feeling she wanted to comment on his other statement.

Maggie had tried, at the beginning, to figure it all out. So had Jesse. Neither one of them could understand why he'd suddenly called it off with Harry. And Jesse couldn't forgive him. Why Maggie had was beyond him, but he was not about to throw that forgiveness away. She was all the family he had left. 

_It shouldn't have been sunny. He wasn't sure why. It should have been dark and dank and dreary and wet like in all the tv shows and movies. But no... it was just sunny and warm and a goddamn perfect day to bury his mother and brother, side by side next to the far older grave of his father. Caitlin and Barry and the others had left about twenty minutes earlier. Maggie was going to get the car. It was quiet, and he wanted it to be loud. Loud like their last moments probably had been, when the tractor trailer had crushed Dante's car into a guardrail. They said Dante died instantly. But his mother... she'd taken time, suffering, dying next to her already dead son. She never made it to the hospital._

“I'm sorry, Cisco.” 

_God, that voice. He hadn't heard that voice in a year._

_Cisco looked up from where he'd been staring and felt all the air come out of his body. Harry was standing across from the now filled holes in the ground, just waiting for their stone markers. He was dressed all in black, his glasses in place, his hair messy and delightful, his eyes sad and softly illuminated behind the contacts. And there was real, gentle, honest affection and sorrow in those eyes. Those goddamn wonderful eyes._

_All Cisco could do was stare at him, the first tears he'd cried all day finally coming out, rolling hot and terrible down his cheeks as he sucked in air and his face crumpled. Harry's hands came out of his pockets and he seemed to hesitate, his whole body physically strained as though he knew he shouldn't. He wasn't allowed, dammit. But then._

“Fuck.” _Harry swore, and crossed between the holes, straight to Cisco. And just... held him. And Cisco shouldn't have let him. He knew better. But he was in so much pain, so filled with regret and anger and searing, unending sorrow that when Harry's body was suddenly there, he melted into him and sobbed. Just let all those emotions finally take him over and let Harry soak it all up. Because he couldn't do this alone. Not this._

 _He wasn't sure how long he cried for, how long Harry's arms held onto him. But when the tears finally stopped and his legs could finally hold him again, Harry's hands came up to his face. His thumbs smoothed away the tears, those brilliant blues watching his chocolate hues quietly. Then Harry just kissed his forehead. His hands fell away._ “I'm so sorry.” _He whispered, one last time. And then... Harrison Wells walked away._

_Cisco had no way of knowing that would be the last time he'd ever see him._

“I guess it's something I have to think about some more.” Maggie finally said, and Cisco blinked a little. Clearing his throat, he straightened and pushed off the wall. 

“It's a tricky situation. But whatever you do, I know you'll do what's best. And I'll be behind you, one hundred percent.” He smiled warmly at her. And she smiled back.

“Come on, let's go have some fun.” She grabbed his hand and he nodded. Yeah. Fun. He could pretend to do that. Truthfully, he should have been ecstatic. Because, seriously... Comic-Con?! But he just wasn't. The passion for just about everything died when he forced Harry to leave. Disaster after disaster seemed to fall upon him after that. He was a stranger living a life that should never have been his. His world was a prison. And if it wasn't for Maggie, for the team, for people who needed his help... well, Cisco Ramon might have checked out a long time ago..

* * *

He woke the next morning to the phone ringing.

Not his phone.

 _That_ phone.

It was such out of date tech at this point that it was practically a fossil. But he still kept it charged, working, functional. He was staring up at the ceiling as it buzzed on the bedside table, the sound grating to his ears. He sighed hard, then reached over and grabbed it without looking, the same familiar 'Private' glaring obnoxiously on the screen. 

“What?” he hissed after he hit the answer button. A very digital laugh was heard on the other end. He hit the speaker button and let the phone drop to the pillow before dragging his hands over his face. “It's seven in the fucking morning. What the hell do you want?”

It was strange, that he still had these conversations with the Stalker. The person responsible for his hell, for his torturous life. But he kept the phone just for that reason. He used to say it was so he could find clues, wait for the Stalker to slip up, find a way to get to them. But they never did. Now it was just... what? A sick comfort? Cisco didn't even really know.

_'Did you enjoy your day with Maggie yesterday?'_

“God, don't you ever get tired of watching me? You'd think you'd have better fucking things to do with your time.” He fumed, sitting up and tossing the covers aside as he planted bare feet to the floor. 

_'I gave you the option, if you recall. Meet me, and the watching ends.'_

Cisco let out a half snarl, half chuckle. “No, you said you wanted me to, and I quote, 'Have a relationship' with you. Seriously?! Seriously.” He shook his head, standing up and grabbing the phone as he did, moving toward the bathroom. “You're pathetic. That you did all this just to... what? Get me in your pants?” He shook his head, dropping the phone in the sink as he lifted the toilet seat and began to pee, not even caring that the voice on the other end could hear. “You ruined my fucking life!” He shouted, mid pee. 

_'What other options do you have, Cisco? Wells isn't coming back. He's gone. And, let's face it... your life is rather sad. How could seeing me possibly make it worse?'_

Cisco flushed the toilet and stood in front of the sink, staring down at the phone and considering momentarily turning the water on, letting the phone drown. But he grit his teeth and plucked it out, setting it on the counter to wash his hands. “I'd rather die, honestly.” He turned the water on, squirted some soap in his hands and scrubbed, well aware the Stalker wouldn't be able to reply till the sound of rushing water stopped. When it did, there was a sigh on the other end.

_'I'll make a deal with you, Cisco.'_

“You and your damn deals.” he groused, wiping his hands on his pajama pants before grabbing the phone. 

_'You might like this one. Date me. Ten dates. And if by the end of those dates, you don't feel some sort of attraction, I'll let you try to get revenge on me. I'll even stop using the meta abilities I stole to give you a real chance.'_

Cisco froze in place, just past the threshold of the bathroom. “Wait... why... why would you do that?” He asked, well aware of his dubious tone. The voice on the phone chuckled a little.

_'Perhaps I don't have as much willpower as you? I believe I've waited long enough. Four years, I think, is pushing it. Do we have a deal? Or not.'_

Cisco lowered the phone, staring around the apartment. The bare walls. The trash on the counter. The lack of photos. The pile of laundry against the bedroom door. The gray, dreary feeling everywhere. He could be free of this. All of this. He could get his revenge, kill this bastard. Find Harry. Tell him everything. Beg for him to come home. And all he had to do was sit through ten dates?

“What are the rules?” He asked flatly.

_'Rules?'_

“Yeah, rules. There's always rules.”

_'Show up on time. Every time. And don't try anything foolish. I'll have full possession and use of the abilities I've stolen. Until after the tenth date. And if by then, as I've said, you feel nothing in return... then you are free to try and enact your revenge, which I am quite sure you have dreamed up several scenarios for.'_

“Oh, you have no idea.” Cisco smiled, and it wasn't pleasant. “Fine. When and where? And I'm not dressing up.”

Cisco couldn't see it, but he didn't have to. He knew the Stalker was smiling. And somehow, that worried him. Because it felt a little like the Stalker had won something... something big. 

But Cisco Ramon sure as hell had a lot of willpower, the Stalker was right about that.

And sweet revenge, vengeance, whatever the fuck anyone wanted to call it, was sure as hell going to be his...

**Author's Note:**

> (To be continued...)


End file.
